(OK, OK, so this page isn't under construction any more. Does that mean I can't still use the "Under Construction" graphic? I like it. Anyway, I thought it was pretty appropriate on a web page about cemeteries to have a guy eternally digging.)

About the author ...

I know what you're probably thinking. A guy who spent years of his life researching and writing a book about cemeteries must be a real weirdo, right? A pathetic guy with no friends, no life, spending his days lurking around graveyards. Certainly not the kind of guy you'd ever want to run into in a dark alley, right?

Well, sure. But that doesn't mean I'm not a fun-loving guy, too. At least that's what all these hula dancers seemed to think (even though they all seem to be flashing the International Sign Language hand gestures for, "Hey, bring us a telephone, quick, so we can call for help!")

Anyway, if you really care, here's the quick bio:

After 15 years working as a newspaper reporter and editor at several newspapers in the Chicago area, I decided to leave the cornfields, humidity and unsuccessful sports teams behind and head west to seek my fame and fortune. Or at least work on my tan.

We settled in Pasadena, CA, about three years ago, and I've been working as a free-lance writer for various business and travel trade magazines.

Other things I've done since we moved out here:

Wrote a few feature-length film scripts, which I'm still willing to give to anyone who wants to read them. You don't even have to be a big-name producer or director. You can be a medium-name producer or director. I don't even care. Just as long as you've got about $80 million.

Appeared as an extra in a couple of television series pilots that were never aired. In case they ever dust off "Celebrity," a behind-the-scenes show biz drama, look for me in the party scenes. According to my pay stub, my role was "Glamorous Person." Type-casting, of course.

Appeared as an extra in a couple of shows that actually got on the air, including my big break as an orderly in an episode of "E.R." Even with no formal medical training, my towel-folding scenes have been compared to the best work of Olivier. And my work on "Judging Amy," where I appeared as "Distinguished Man," had the producers talking of a spin-off series.

Appeared on an episode of "Win Ben Stein's Money" -- and didn't. Didn't win his money, that is. But I did plug my book.

Did I mention that I have a couple of scripts I'm trying to get someone to read?

And, of course, spent hours and hours wandering through cemeteries, and cooped up in library basements, looking up obituaries.

Anyway, thanks for your interest. Enjoy the site, have fun, and please buy the book.

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